Clashes aside, last year’s pumps would have been a more apt choice than leather shoes as the trek from Bar Music Hall over to Café 1001 is strenuous to say the least. Morgan of Does It Offend You, Yeah? fame kicks sunset off to a rather raucous jumpstart, seamlessly blending Gang of Four guitars with Bonde do Role beats before drooling visceral screams over Plugs' unique concoction. It’s a gripping, stunning experience that may not follow in the BBC royalty footsteps of his bit on the side. Up next you’d be forgiven for feeling whizzed up the length of these Isles to the Glasgow leg 48 hours later as The Twilight Sad pierce the cavernous beams of 93 Feet East with their brand of emotionally scarred howls. And you thought Arcade Fire were epic? A mad dash west sees half Welsh/ half Ancient-Greek goddess-in-waiting Marina & the Diamonds act out their pantomime-perfect gems glinting with Kate Bush comparisons. Yet all that glimmers isn’t gold and Marina is bronze at best. ‘I Am Not A Robot’ borders on the comic grotesque last seen splattered all over an Electric Six record in the bargain bin but ‘Obsessions’ goes some way to rectifying lyrical hiccups with its sultry balladry. There’s a fair delve into the hearts of men before she’s the object of any obsession but refracted glimpses of greatness glint. Chances are you haven’t experienced anywhere from duo to quintet Crystal Fighters but a hoard of Hoxton heroes have done the maths and calculated that crystal’s worth a load more than diamond. Posing as Basque freedom fighters hailing from West London, it’s about as bizarre a concept as a decent Eminem record yet with flailing limbs, six foot wood blocks and hallucinatory ukuleles there’s a new bee in British dance music’s bonnet. Another lot with enough buzz to power East London for an hour or two are Australian anthemic upstarts The Temper Trap. Set against an NME-smothered backdrop, lump them in with grimy scenesters at your peril. ‘Down River’ bursts emotional banks as their four-part bellowed harmonies wreak of gang mentality and desperation. ‘Science of Fear’, their momentous set-closer, restores hope in a largely uninspiring Aussie musical pool of thought. Vice may well pick up on frontman Dougie’s trilby before landing it in its DON’T fashion tips. Billed tonight as a DJ set, the Café 1001 cat (or Jack Peñate) is let out the bag come early evening but it seems most of tonight’s staggering daggers missed the telegram. Those who do bear witness to quadrilateral dance moves and even squarer trousers are treated to a set beaming new material out of every seam. Where once Peñate saw his pure emotions torn and strewn across station platforms and glitzy Ritz floors, tonight is out with the old and in with the new. The enthralling wilt of ‘Second Minute or Hour’ receives a rapturous response from the innards of the Bohemian café to rival the trendiest of Brooklyn hideaways but it’s last single ‘Tonight’s Today’ that ignites hearts, minds and coffees alike as both The XX and Florence assume backing vocal duties. It’s a special moment and sumptuous vocals paired with the littering of balloons all over the floor make it an inexplicably monumental highlight. With one last throw of the dilemma dice, it’s off to Cargo where dishevelled Lemonhead Evan Dando has ditched gleaming hair and bugged out sunglasses in favour of army jacket, bruised and battered acoustic and ruggedness. Not only looking out of his depth standing before glitchy projections and green lasers that swirl around the caves of Cargo like fireflies, he almost looks out of place out of a sleeping bag and under a roof. Aesthetics aside, it’s an awe-inspiring blast-from-the-past with the likes of ‘Confetti’ from the seminal ‘It’s A Shame About Ray’ provoking stoner stirrings in the sturdiest of souls. Ramshackle, raw and rough around the edges, Dando never sounded so immaculate.
And with queues skirting around the block for Rusko’s drum’n’bass onslaught of Herbal the night bus back North beckons. Until Shoreditch crawls out of its prejudices and calls again next year, exposing its true heart.
